Have ever gotten upset at a family member or a friend that knows you well for not doing something you expected? Had you previously communicated with that person about your feelings or thoughts, or even what you would expect out of your relationship?
I think most of us have experienced sadness, disappointment, or feelings of loneliness when people haven't acted as we expected. And really, often if we go by movies, tv shows, and even our own families and friends we sometimes feel that people ought to kind of know what to do. However, what about the second question…
Did you previously communicate your needs, wants or expectation from your relationship with that person?
Let me ask you something else. Why did you expect anything at all, especially if you hadn't discussed your expectation before? Why?
In my life, most often if not always, expectations without communication have led to disappointment – especially when those expectations were never discussed.
To prevent being disappointed in the people in my life, I stopped expecting things. However, I also made an effort to communicate more openly about my needs, wants and expectations, especially with those to whom I'm close. It is unrealistic to expect people to know how I feel if I don't communicate, and vice-versa.
Questions and Communication are powerful tools we tend to forget to use in relationships.
We need to let others to know what we want/need/expect (and again, in my opinion expectations are pointless unless there's a serious communicated commitment or contract). And we need to ask, respond and communicate honestly in order for everyone to be on the same page.
I encourage you to practice clear communication, as an act of compassion for yourself and those around you. Asking questions allows you to know how to be of service to others, and maybe even be able to end the suffering of someone in need. That my friends, is for me at the core of compassion.
From the perspective of my work for the Charter for Compassion, I want to invite you to communicate with us. Please allow me to ask you some questions about our website, the newsletter, social media and other platforms in order to know what you are looking for when it comes to compassion. It won't take more than 5 minutes--unless you want to elaborate, which would be equally welcome of course! (if you'd rather answer the survey on its own page click here)
Please do not hesitate to reach out to me directly at email@example.com I would be very happy to hear from you!
With love & curiosity,
Felipe Zurita, Marketing & Social Media Director
Charter for Compassion
This message from Felipe Zurita, Marketing and Social Media Director of the Charter for Compassion, appears in our 3/14/2022 weekly newsletter. To sign up for our newsletter, scroll all the way down to the end of this page to get to the bottom menu, in the newsletter section enter your email address and click on subscribe.